Feedback Workshop (English)

Feedback workshop

Don’t you just loathe that word, feedback? It gives most people cold shivers when hearing it. Such terror. Even when we want to know, it feels like satistic and punitive.

We all agree that feedback is a critical component of any successful organization, team, or individual. It provides us with the opportunity to reflect on our actions, identify areas for improvement, and to enhance our skills and abilities. However, giving and receiving feedback in a constructive way is not always easy. It can be challenging to know how to deliver feedback effectively, and it can be even more challenging to receive feedback without feeling defensive or discouraged.

Feedback can be such a scary and unsafe place to be when on the receiving end of feedback. This can be out of:

1. Fear of failure or rejection: Many people fear that receiving feedback will reveal their weaknesses or shortcomings, and they may worry that this will lead to failure or rejection.
2. Fear of criticism: Some people may be sensitive to criticism, and they may worry that feedback will be overly harsh or negative.
3. Lack of control: Receiving feedback means giving up some control over how others perceive us, and this can be uncomfortable or anxiety-provoking.
4. Fear of change: Feedback may suggest that changes need to be made, and some people may resist change or feel overwhelmed by the prospect of making changes.
5. Negative past experiences: People who have had negative experiences with feedback in the past may be hesitant to receive feedback again, even if the feedback is intended to be helpful.

When we are afraid of something, we go into a fight/flight/freeze modus. It is our natural way of coping with external threats. Many people will get defensive or strike back when receiving feedback. Others may discard the feedback altogether or they might pull up a wall to protect themselves. This wall may be behing a smiling and nodding face but inside one is trying hard not to feel the sting.

Feedback here is based on ideas of right and wrong. Most people do not want to be wrong or do things that are wrong. We want to be accepted, to belong, we want to contribute to the joy and wellbeing of others, we want to be loved. Of course, then, we don’t like to hear that we did something wrong. The truth, however, (spoiler alert) is that there is no such thing as right and wrong. There is only what the perceiver experiences. What one person sees as an awful trait of yours, may be a reason for the another to fall in love with you. No one can decide that you are good or bad or that your deeds are right or wrong. There is no such objective thing.

Ok, so then what?

We need to change something about the we way give feedback and the way we receive it. Feedback is important for all of us to grow. It is a different perspective on ourselves and we may learn something from it about how others experience us. Feedback is also crucial as a way of expressing oneself to others. A lot of what we share with others has to do with how we experience them. This can be joyful and pleasant but it can also be something we are not enjoying or that even may feel annoying or even hurtful.

In Connecting Communication or also known as Non-Violent Communication (NVC), feedback is a just a way of expressing with honesty how something is experienced by you. It is not to judge the other nor to say that something is wrong with the other. It is to share what needs of yours are (not) met with specific actions of the other and perhaps making a request. All this is spoken in a language that supports connection, learning and trust. We are authentically honest, open and curious. Feedback then becomes a conversation that feels safe and valuable for both. Receiving each other openly and respectfully. It creates a space for both to be just as you are and to share how we can contribute to life and in making it more rich and beautiful.

But how?

During this workshop we will discuss the Non-Violent Communication theory around feedback and put it into practice through interactive exercises. Whether you are a manager, a team leader, or an individual seeking better ways of communicating, this workshop will provide you with the tools and techniques you need to give and receive feedback in a way that promotes growth, connection and honesty.

Trainer

Gaula Shehadeh is a highly educated and certified trainer in mindfulness and (non-violent) communication. She is deeply passionate about these fields and she has many years of experience as a trainer. She is typically described as wise, empathic and playful. She comes from a multiculural background and speaks good English and Dutch. Check out reviews on the website.

Date

Thursday 25 May 2023

09.30-16.30 hrs.

Location

Rooseboomstraat 47, Den Haag

Language

English

Cost

€100 including a lavish vegetarian lunch, a light and happy venue, study materials and all-you-can-drink coffee and tea.